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Spent much of the day exchanging emails with Warner Bros records, trying to acertain who owns the Red Noise album. After some exchanges and copies of old '70s contracts being sent to me, it seems that Warners own the album for the UK and rest of the world, (though not for the USA and Canada.) I was hoping to have the right to re-release the album here but it seems that the way the original deal was set up by ex-Be Bop Deluxe management at the time cut me out of the equation. Yet another example of the kind of underhand dealings that went on back then, (and sometimes, still do now.) The situation is ongoing though and I may yet have the right to certain recordings that were not part of the original album agreement. We'll see... Meanwhile, not much else to report other than a few hours spent preparing more potential images for my next two releases. Some nice work done in that department. I really have to now make some final decisions as to what goes where and which ones work best. I'll try to finalise some of this tomorrow. Also today made more flyers for upcoming albums and the 70th birthday concert event that the Nelsonica team and myself are planning for later this year. We have a pencilled in date for the 1st of December at The Clothworker's Hall and there's a good possibility that 'Orchestra Futura' might re-assemble for the event too. Fingers crossed...

'The Unrealist' album was let loose today on my Bandcamp page. A digital download only album, it is already being taken up by fans at a fast rate. Some good comments being posted about it too, which is gratifying. Emi is on her way home from London as I type these words. She went very early this morning to renew her Japanese passport in preparation for her trip to Tokyo in April. Considering that Django and I have been at a loss today without her around, her absence for ten days in April is going to be difficult for us. Can't exactly explain to Django that mummy is going to Japan and will eventually return...he'll just wonder where she is all the time. I've put a fish pie in the oven so it will be ready for us to eat when Emi gets back from London in half an hour or so. Eating a bit later than usual tonight and consequently having to take my insulin injection later too. Which I must now attend to...

Deliberating with myself over which images I've made will best suit a couple of upcoming albums. The main focus of attention at the moment is the 'Dynamos And Tremolos' album. I've built up more images for this than will be needed but I'm undecided as to which might be the most appropriate selection in terms of overall design. The album is a combination of synths and guitar sounds and my initial idea was to reflect this using images of retro synthesisers and old guitars. But I also wanted to bring on board a more sci-fi touch with antiquated, distressed, robot pictures. Perhaps I could accomodate both concepts in some way, maybe by opting for a digi-pak album presentation rather than a jewel case. That option would allow me a little more space for images, albeit at a higher cost of manufacture. I'm going to sleep on it and decide tomorrow. Emi is travelling to London in the morning to renew her Japanese passport. She has to go to the Japanese embassy there to do this, which means a very early departure from our local station to arrive at Kings Cross in time to get to the embassy for the lengthy proceedure of passport renewal. Japan has very strict enforcements of this kind of thing, but it has to be done in readiness for her trip to Tokyo in April. I'll need to be up at 6AM, a time in not at all used to, to take her to the station... Django and I will miss her very much during her April absence from our lives when she travels to Japan.. Though it's 'only' for ten days I'm sure it will feel like an eternity to us. My health issues create worries and being alone with no-one to keep their eye on me is a matter for nervous concern. Perhaps I'm being over anxious and everything will be fine. One thing to address is my food intake. Emi has learned how to cook just the right type of food for someone suffering from diabetes like myself. I, on the other hand, hardly cook at all, so I'll be reliant on 'ready meals', of which there are only a limited number that suit my condition. Managing diabetes and balancing meals is not easy. Bought a DVD today, a documentary about John Coltrane titled 'Chasing 'Trane.' Looking forward to watching this. At the moment, I'm going back to work on more images for the previously mentioined album package. 'The Unrealist' album is due, however, for immanent release on Bandcamp...a casual, free roaming instrumental album for guitar lovers. A pleasant aside in the torrent of work that awaits release.

Just now completed the running order for the 'Drive This Comet Actross The Sky' album. Encountered some technical problems with this... I always burn draft running orders to audio CDRs to see how well the tracks sit together, but this time it has not been easy. Read on to understand why.... A few weeks ago I managed to order some new blank audio CDRs from a company on the internet. Unfortunately, proper audio CDRs are not as easy to come by today as they were a few years ago, mainly due to the increasing computerisation of files for audio. But, being a more digitally organic type of chap, I like to burn an actual audio CD to hear the tracks back in their selected running order, to see how they feel on the antiquated hi-fi downstairs. These draft running orders are not assembled on computer burned CDs but on a dedicated hardware audio CD burner here in my studio. Well, I ordered two boxes of blank audio CDRs from the internet, all of which should have worked ok in my hardware burner. Unfortunately, disc after disc that I placed in the burner triggered the message 'OPC ERROR.' So I now have a pile of unusable discs, all giving this same error message, despite having paid through the nose for them. Was it the hardware burner itself that was at fault, I wondered? I then found two remaining discs from an older box of CDRs, (same brand and type as these newer ones.) I placed one of these into the CDR burner and it worked just fine, no problem at all. My only conclusion is that this new batch of two boxes worth of CDRs is being sold, (despite the fact that they're all faulty,) as legitimate, usable discs. Clearly, they're not. Anyway, I've now finally managed to assemble a running order for the 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky' album. This running order actually misses around four or five potential tracks out. Too many to include. Maybe they will form the basis of a future album. Or maybe not. Here it is, and here it will stay, all being well. 1: 'FABLES OF THE FUTURE.' 2: 'HERE IS WHERE I DREAM.' 3: 'LOST IN SPACE.' 4: 'HOUSE OF MYSTERY.' 5: 'DRIVE THIS COMET ACROSS THE SKY.' 6: 'HERE I AM, (AND YOU CAN HEAR ME.)' 7: 'LUNA ROSA.' 8: 'YOUR IMAGINATION.' 9: 'RAINDROPS.' 10: 'HELLO YOU BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE.' 11: 'TIME IS RUNNING AWAY.' (THE BLUE NOWHERE.) 12: 'THIS AND THAT.' 13: 'CERTAIN CIRCLES.' 14: 'WHERE ARE THE STARS THAT FALL FROM HEAVEN.' 15: 'SERENE IN SILVER.' 16: 'THE TICKING OF TIME.' Meanwhile...another flyer for the 'Dynamos And Tremolos' album...

Enjoyed a very pleasant evening meal at our excellent village pub with two good friends. The conversation inevitably turned to the increasing incursions of age into our lives and its attendant debilitating effects on both body and mind. Whilst our companions are a good few years younger than Emi and myself, (at least by some 11 or 12 years,) there was plenty of discussion about how the world wears away at the physical fabric of our bodies, and how time, once seemingly in infinite supply, suddenly seems ridiculously short and speedy. These concerns, I suppose, are a regular preoccupation for those of us entering our senior years, no matter how much we try to deny them. As someone or other once said, (and I wonder who it actually was who said it,) "Old age isn't for cissies..." All maudlin thoughts aside, the evening was well spent in the company of good people with a firm grasp of musical appreciation, and we very much appreciated their kindness and hospitality, (despite my hearing difficulties which made deciphering the across table conversation somewhat difficult at times.) Work here still going on and on, (as always,) with more recordings and mixings for future albums. It's what I do, and what I am, and there's little chance of escaping it without incurring some kind of depression or darkness. It's what keeps me afloat in this world. Is that a sad thing or a wonderful thing? I don't for one minute pretend to know. My activity veers constantly between feelings of elation and abject failure. There's no longer any attempt to polish my work to some level of commercial or popular approval. Impossible. There's no point or inclination to even try any more. All that's left is to just state the moment and be as true to it as I'm able, and then move on, and as quickly as possible. Damn the consequences. Stand or fall by art's ideals and authenticity, for whatever that's worth. Meanwhile and once again, I'm contemplating this year's 70th birthday concert event with a certain amount of trepidation. Not allowed to reveal a date yet, (though one has been 'pencilled in,') but a potential title has been thought up. It will be a Clothworker's Hall event again, in Leeds, Yorkshire, and now has the working title of: "PLECTRONICA: A CELEBRATION OF BILL NELSON AT 70." Various surprises being lined up at the moment, but more of this later...

Valentine's day. Cold and wet outside. Looking forward to spending the evening in front of the log fire. First going shopping to buy something nice for dinner and maybe a bottle of bubbly. Emi bought me a nice Valentine's gift: a biography of Norman Bel Geddes titled 'The Man Who Built The Future.' Promises to be a good read. I bought Emi a new pair of boots and a 'plane ticket to Japan to visit her relatives and friends. She's going for ten days in April but I'm staying here to take care of Django and keep my medical appointments. It's a hassle travelling with diabetes and the need for insulin injections and blood-glucose level checks. So, I'll have to remain here on my lonesome. 'The Unrealist' download due very soon but I'm working on images for 'Dynamos And Tremolos' which will be the next physical CD release. I've almost made enough images now to send to Martin Bostock for him to work on the layout and typography. This will be an interesting package I think. Went to buy a mini-amp and microphone for my mother to give to her great granddaughter, (and my grand niece,) Bethany who is seven years old today. She's been given a guitar for her birthday and mum is providing the little amplifier and a microphone for her. May well be another musical member of the Nelson family in the making. Time to venture out in the rain to shop for culinary delights!

Friday again already. And where did that week go? Time plays head games with those of us of a 'certain age.' I've not achieved anywhere near the amount of things I intended to do with these last seven days, yet they've gone by in a blur of something or other. Haircuts were completed on Wednesday and now Emi and I feel more human and can walk amongst our fellow humans without thinking we look like Wurzel Gummidge and Raggedy Ann. I'm still working towards the conclusion of the 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky' album. I already have lots of possible tracks finished but, when I began to review them the other day I decided there were too many instrumental tracks and not enough vocal tracks, so have continued to write and record. It's ongoing and no particular need to rush I suppose...but I'm enjoying the ride so why slow down? Coming soon on Bandcamp will be 'The Unrealist' album, probably around the 25th of this month. But I've now decided that the next physical CD album should be 'Dynamos And Tremolos,' which goes in a slightly different direction to recent offerings, being a fusion of synth and guitar. I've yet to take this album to Fairview Studio for John Spence to master, ready for manufacturing, but I'm beginning to work on ideas for the album's visual design. Not sure when this will be released. A time slot for manufacturing and mailing out will need to be allocated once the artwork is complete and the album mastered, but maybe in April, or at least May, all being well... Bought the new 'Blade Runner' film on DVD the other day and watched it in front of a blazing log fire. Actually managed to stay awake for most of it and was impressed by the visual design and amazing attention to detail. The plot wasn't perhaps as good as the first instalment, but it served to back up the wonderful special effects. I'll need to watch it again, which is a good sign. A trip to Leeds today, to visit the old Market Hall, a wonderful building which almost got demolished by the council a few years back. Petitions were signed by local people and market traders and, amazingly, it was given a reprieve. It really is an antique jewel in Leeds' all too modern crown. We went to the fish market section and bought scallops, prawns, squid, Tuna and Salmon. Emi is cooking some of that right now and the aroma drifting upstairs to my studio from the kitchen is very appetising! And now I need to go downstairs and take my evening Insulin injection before I sit down to eat. And so I'll close the journal for today.

Another cold day. Minus 4 this morning, despite bright sunshine. The little oil filled portable radiator in my studio struggling to give out anything more than a mild background heat. Emi and I are awaiting hair stylist, (and one time 'Gentleman Rocketeer' keyboardist,) Steve Cook arriving this afternoon to deal with cutting our hair. Last time we had our hair cut was early last October so we're both looking quite bedraggled. Looking forward to seeing Steve again. My latest album release, 'That Old Mysterioso,' sold its last copy a few days ago. A very quick sell out which is good for all kinds of reasons, not least that it opens the way for further releases from the backlog of albums I've got waiting in the wings. Next one up will be 'The Unrealist,' an instrumental album which began life with a couple of left-over tracks from 'Songs For Ghosts.' I then added to these and 'The Unrealist' was the result. The album has had its artwork completed and will be released as a digital download only on my Bandcamp page, probably at the end of this month. Beyond that, I'm not sure which of the dozen albums completed should come next in the sequence. All but one were recorded last year and a couple the year before that, so I'll need to refresh my memory as to the style of music they contain. I like to maintain a reasonable amount of variation from album to album to keep things interesting, both for fans and myself. Have been having further talks with Ian Haydock regarding the plans for a special 70th birthday event at The Clothworker's Hall late this year. Various things being discussed and put in place, including a possible 'Orchestra Futura' set, alongside my own solo set. Dreaming up a title for this event requires some thought...and my mind's been a bit of a blank on it so far. Some vague ideas but nothing I can reveal yet. Maybe soon though...

On one of the Facebook pages devoted to the history of Wakefield, (my birthplace,) today was a post about three headstones that can be found in a corner of Wakefield's Thornes Park. The headstones mark the graves of three pets that, a hundred years or so ago, belonged to the Gaskell family that owned the land that is now the park. They had a magnificent mansion in that acerage. Their children actually owned the pets and one of the headstones is simply inscribed with the words 'My Mouse.' Such a large headstone for such a small creature. Anyway, this reminded me that one of the first songs I'd ever written, back in the 1960s, was a song titled 'Keep Your Feathers Fine.' It was a gentle, hippyish song about strolling through Thornes park, seeing the ducks on the lake and so on, but one line was directly inspired by me seeing the mouse's gravestone. In fact, I'd been aware of the mouse grave since being a little kid when my parents would take me to the park. The line in the song says: 'taking my mouse for a walk 'round the block'...A naive sentiment but I was full of wonder at such things in those days and times were innocent and much less cynical. I was also reminded of a notebook I kept in those long ago 1960s, which I've included a photo' of here. It shows two pages from the notebook. One shows part of a list of records I owned at that time, the other page contains a doodle I did with a Robert Crumb style cartoon character walking past the headstone with 'MY MOUSE' written on it. The partial list of albums I owned then is interesting. Especially that I thought it important to jot them down in the notebook. I guess that's the enthusiasm, or innocence, of youth. At that time, I wasn't a professional musician, nor did I harbour any hopes of becoming one. I was basically a fan of various artists and bought imported albums whenever I could afford to do so. The wheels of time turn at extraordinairy speed sometimes, and my life changed in unexpected, though welcome, directions. Where I am now seems almost like a miracle of destiny. Or maybe just one of those happy accidents of circumstance. Today, I've made available a new video in the Essoldo Cinema section of my Dreamsville website. The video accompanies a preview of the title track of an album I'm currently working on titled 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky.' This is the final mix of the song but the version with the video is in its unmastered state and won't be mastered until the album is completed. So, having said that, it's time for me to get back to working on what I hope will be the final track for the album. And here's a photo' of my studio. Busy as usual...

Lots of stuff happened since my previous journal entry. Hard to recall everything in detail but, basically, Emi got her handbag and contents back. She was SO relieved. Everything was intact, including the money in her purse and her 'phone and Filofax. The handbag had been found virtually right after we'd driven away from the Co-op, where it had been lost, and immediately handed into the store. We'd gone back there once we'd discovered it was missing but, at that time, the staff said they hadn't found anything. In fact, the handbag was behind the counter all the time...it was just that the counter staff hadn't let the other staff know they had found it. It was lucky that I went back again the next day to see if there had been any developments and discovered that it was there. So, all's well that ends well. Thankfully, there are some decent people in our village who did the right thing by handing it in... Another visit to the Podiatrist today for further attention to my Diabetes afflicted feet. I have a brace on one of my toes now which is supposed to help. Got another dressing applied too. Completed an interview with the magazine 'Songwriter' today. A lengthy interview which I hope may be of some interest to the magazine's readers. Had a meeting with Mark Powell of Esoteric Records regarding their purchase of the Be Bop Deluxe catalogue. Some very interesting things going on with that. There may be a couple of surprises when the albums are eventually re-released. Meanwhile, today sees the release of my album 'THAT OLD MYSTERIOSO,' an album that I happen to like very much. It was recorded last year but has had to wait for a suitable release date, along with many other finished albums backed up. Frustrating that these works can't find a way out more quickly, but I have to accept the practicalities of manufacturing and their packaging preparation. My ideas move, unfortunately, much faster than the system allows. Many years ago now, I said in an interview that albums should be released monthly, like magazines. We're still some way off that but, I'm getting closer to that ideal!

Depressing day. Emi has lost her handbag. It contained her phone, wallet with cash, credit cards and, (more precious to her than those items,) her Filofax notebook with years of contact addresses for her friends, both here and in Japan, and lists of people's birthdays and other important details. She had placed the handbag in the boot of her Renault Modus car after a walk around the Designer Centre outside of town. On the way home we stopped off at the village Co-op for some supplies, and I think that the handbag may have fallen out of the boot of the car in the darkness when it was opened to put the supplies in. As soon as we reached home, we realised it was missing and rushed back into the village to see if it was laying on the road where we'd previously parked...but no sign of it at all. We asked if anything had been handed in at the Co-op but they said no-one had handed anything in. Then we drove back to the Designer Centre on the off-chance that it might have fallen from the car in the car park there...again, after contacting the lost luggage department, no luck at all. Drove back to our village again and did yet another search of the main street...revealing nothing. Back at home I contacted the bank and credit card people to report the missing cards. This wasn't easy...took a while to actually navigate through the endless, infuriating automated responses to speak to a real human being. After various checks and verifications I finally got the debit card cancelled and a replacement ordered. Then on to the credit card company and the same hoops to jump through before the credit card could also be cancelled. My calls to Emi's missing mobile were just met with answerphone routines...whoever had picked up her handbag wasn't about to answer my calls. So I then got in touch with the mobile phone provider to block her phone in case whoever had it might try to run up calls at her expense. All of this convoluted process took ages but at least we've managed to, hopefully, stop abuse of her cards and phone, wherever it is or whoever has it. So Emi is feeling depressed and I'm depressed for her too. She said it feels like she has had a leg cut off. On a slightly more positive note, the video for 'The Boy Who Lived In The Future' has been uploaded to the 'Essoldo Cinema' on my website. Made for the concert I gave in support of the Wakefield Unity Hall restoration fund a few years ago, it shows certain scenes around Wakefield. And the music makes a nice accompaniment to it. Tomorrow a meeting with Mark Powell of Esoteric/Cherry Red records to discuss their plans for the re-issue of the old Be Bop Deluxe recordings.

Had an appointment with the podiatry department again today. I'm experiencing problems with my feet. Without going into too much detail, I've now been given a special dressing for one of my toes which has to be kept on for four days, after which I have to apply a kind of brace to the toe to try and straighten it. Tests on my feet also show a loss of sensation, which is diabetes related. I'm not supposed to get my foot wet until the four days of wearing the dressing is up, (which will make my daily bath challenging to say the least.) I have to return to the podiatrist in seven days to see how things are going but, in the meantime, it's neccesary to check my feet for ulcers and other damage on a daily basis. Not happy about this as it was one of the problems that lead to the late John Martin, (also a diabetes sufferer,) having to face leg amputation. Sometimes, it's easy to become depressed about these various medical issues, the diabetes obviously, but also its related sight loss, my deafness in one ear, tinnitus, high blood pressure, and so on. I have to remind myself that things could be infinitely worse and that many musicians much younger than me have led much shorter lives. At least I'm finding a way to continue my musical journey with no lack of creative vision. And, whilst on the subject of journeys, another album concept I've had at the back of my mind for several years popped into my consciousness again today: 'Transports Of Delight' an album of music for imaginary travels, might be something I could work on in the near future...But for now, here's an equally imaginary flyer for the album...

Weird and slightly disturbing dreams last night. Strange places that were supposed to be familiar but weren't. A town that resembled my own but, at the same time, didn't. A meeting with a friend from art college called Roger Hitchen, (who I haven't actually seen since the 1960s,) outside a shop in this dream town in the pouring rain. A sudden realisation that I'd left my shoulder bag in the car, (in the car park,) with my money and credit cards in it, followed by a mad dash back to retrieve it....but when I got there, the car was gone, possibly stolen. Reported it to the car park attendant who had to fill in endless forms to file the missing car to the police. Then the dilemma of how to get home with no money or transport, and the absurd realisation that Django, (our wonderful cat,) was with us, and how were we to get him back too? Woke up feeling uneasy... Meanwhile, back on this side of Dreamland, a very cold day here: Minus one on the dial and quite strong snow flurries for a while which made the roads dicey. We ventured out tentatively to buy logs for the fire. All turned to rain and slush later though. A conversation on the 'phone with Martin Bostock who has been working on the layout of the packaging for 'The Unrealist' album, which I'm hoping to make available as a digital download sometime in February. The package artwork is now complete and ready to upload. Those who eventually download the album will be able to also download its artwork too, and, if they wish, burn a disc of the audio and print the artwork to assemble a CD. The download route, whilst not my personally preferred delivery medium, works very well for some fans, and for me in that the number of albums I have waiting for release makes physically manufacturing every album totally impractical.. So, I have to decide whether each new album should be physical CD or a digital download, according to a combination of whim and pragmatism. Whilst on the subject of new albums, I had the inspiration today for another project, one which, at this stage, is only a vague glimmer of an idea and may never see the light of day. But, it could turn out to be something I could carry forward. Or not. The idea is to make one of my more 'orchestrally textured' albums combined with spacy, semi-retro electronica. Part serious, part kitsch, clearly one of my occasional attempts to blur the boundaries between what some people would consider 'high' and 'low' art. The title and concept is 'KOSMOROTICA,' an album of sensual, sexy instrumentals with mildly provocative titles that could be used to accompany 'passionate and intimate moments.' Or at least lull you to sleep afterwards... Well, maybe it will remain a vague idea and never be realised...but you never know...Stranger things have happened...

Stuff bubbling and percolating on various fronts. A meeting looming with Mark Powell from Esoteric/Cherry Red Records about their newly aquired Be Bop Deluxe and Red Noise catalogue, (which they've grabbed from Warner Brothers, who didn't exactly do a good job of reissuing the albums a few years ago.) Hopefully, Cherry Red and Esoteric will give the albums a much better treatment and profile. And, equally hopefully, I'll recieve far better dues for my past work in terms of much needed royalties and renumeration. Domestically, I'm having problems getting someone to come and fix our shed roof. Going through endless hoops in that direction. It's only a shed and just needs new felting due to damage in the storm of a few weeks ago, but is now letting in water and things stored there are not doing good. The company we bought the shed from a couple of years ago won't deal with it as it is out of guarantee...Called a shed repair guy several times now but very hard to get a definite response or commitment from him. Maybe doesn't need the work? Have an appointment with the podiatrist coming up at the start of next week. Diabetes related foot problems. A worry... Emi trying to stave off a cold. Hope I can steer clear of it. Meanwhile, work continues on the 'DRIVE THIS COMET ACROSS THE SKY' album. Another new track begun yesterday. The basic backing laid down this evening but lyrics and vocals to work on tomorrow, (though I won't have much time available as I visit my mother every Saturday to help with her supermarket shopping.) At this point in time, however, I'm about to vacate the studio to go downstairs to watch a DVD. What should it be, I wonder? Another episode of the recent 'Twin Peaks' series or one of many music documentaries: Joe Pass, Bill Frisell, Wes Montgomery, etc, etc... Do I need the surreal weirdness of David Lynch, or something a little more soothing such as the sublime flow of jazz? I'll decide when I've boiled the kettle for tea and biscuits... .

A fairly uneventful day...received a couple of nice 'phone calls from Ian Haydock with regard to the initial setting up of a special event to celebrate my 70th birthday later this year, (which may well be my final live performance.) At the moment it looks like it will be held at the Clothworker's Hall in Leeds....a venue which has a good sound system and great sight lines for the audience. I've been given a potential, penciled-in, date for this, but I'm not allowed to reveal it at this point in time. Though maybe later! There are other things to be confirmed yet, such as the availability of technicians and musicians, (whoops, I think I may have given something away there) and so on and so forth. It involves complex planning which those who attend may, or may not, even realise has taken place, such is the seamlessness and professionalism of these things when they happen. The format and title of the event has still to be worked out, but the venue has required us to book the hall early to avoid problems later. So, all being well, and if my enthusiasm and health holds up, it will all come together with a suitably exciting concept, in time to mark what will be my 70th year on this planet and, amazingly, my 60th year since attempting to first play the guitar...(and believe me, I'm still attempting to figure out how to play it!) Emi and I drove to Harrogate to buy some fish for our freezer from 'Ramus,' our favourite seafood supplier. Was astonished to see snow on the ground and on pavements in Harrogate. We've had nothing here in York, only a few miles away, but it seems that Harrogate had experienced a fair old snowfall overnight. Went for a drink at Harrogate's 'Crown' hotel after shopping, (the site of a previous 'Nelsonica' event as it happens,) and then got stuck in horrendous rush hour traffic on the drive back home. Listened to the BBC News on the car radio, but nothing good to hear on there, I'm afraid. Now working on a final mix of a song titled 'Drifting Through Your Imagination.' This is the third mix of this track...it's proving tricky, compounded with the ongoing strangeness of my mixing desk problems....unpredictable automated fader movements, and so on...it's a frustrating process. But I refuse to cave in to it...onward and ever upward ... Signing off for tonight with a couple more 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky' flyers/posters...

Work continues on the album 'DRIVE THIS COMET ACROSS THE SKY'...Actually, there's probably enough tracks finished to try a rough assembly but I'm not convinced I've got the better of it yet, so work will continue for the rest of the week, then I'll take stock. My plan to make a video for the title track hasn't yet got underway, though I've been gathering lots of images and treating and filtering them ready to sequence when I do start. Once the video is complete, I'm going to post it in the Essoldo Cinema on my website so fans can have a little taste of the album, (though when it will be released is not yet decided, partly because I haven't assembled a running order or decided upon artwork/packaging images yet, but also because I really ought to try and clear some of the backlog of already finished albums first. But I'm always excited by whatever new project I'm working on and, unfortunately, the other albums slip further back in the queue.) On the domestic front, a visit to the doctor today to deliver the results of my blood pressure checks after taking a course of the tablets he proscribed for me in December. Seems that my blood pressure is now in the right 'zone' so I am going to continue taking them as it was too high previously. Only seen this particular chap a couple of times but I really like him. He seems to enjoy music and told me he is a big fan of 'The Cardiacs.' I think I'll drop him a copy of one of my albums to see what he makes of it. Elliot and Elle over for dinner the other night. Emi cooked up a nice meal with special dishes made for Elliot's vegan girlfriend, Nic. Everyone chin-wagged 'till late. A very enjoyable evening. 'Over The Years,' the video I created for the 'New Northern Dream' launch party, has been uploaded to the Essoldo Cinema on my website. It's a 49 minute long autobiographical piece featuring photographs of myself at different points in my life, from infancy right up to current times. I have to admit it feels weird watching myself grow and change over those 70 years...but I can remember what it felt like at every stage, even at the earliest. Its hard to grasp that the photographs of myself at two or three years old, taken on a caravan holiday at St Leonards in Skegness, is the same person as the whiskery man of recent photographs...And yet I can remember laying awake in that caravan with rain rattling on its roof, all those long years ago, as if it were only yesterday. Perhaps this is one of the reasons that time and memory is a reoccurring subject in many of my songs. Right...now back to work!

A fairly uneventful time right now, despite the regular outrageous insanities from America and the laughable Trump so-called 'Presidency.' Only hope that these abberations don't become accepted as some sort of 'norm.' Crazy times for all of us, and entirely out of kilter with, what should be, a more hospitable and tolerant 21st Century. Here at home, I continue to work on the album which looks like being titled 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky.' All going well at the moment. Emi is out for the evening, attending her annual Flower Guild celebration dinner. So, I've been relegated to a Marks and Spencer 'ready meal.' A sudden reversal to the bachelor life. Ok, I suppose... Medical stuff to sort out tomorrow, doctor's appoinments to make, medicines to order...boring but essential stuff to maintain my life and my music. And, (as I often say,) so it goes... Elle and Elliot and Elliot's girlfriend Nicky were over here last night for dinner. A really lovely evening talking with them over the dinner table which went on until late. Always great to see and hear from them. All my 'kids', (though now adults,) bring so much love and joy into my life. The older I become, the more I value their input. Another track almost completed for the 'DRIVE THIS COMET' album...some percussion to add tomorrow, then begin the mixing process. A couple of days from now should see it finished and added to the list of possibilities for a future release. It's gaining traction fast...

Emi and I enjoyed a long, (and somewhat liquid,) lunch today with three friends who I haven't seen for a while. (Guitarist/vocalist/songwriter John Parr and his wife Sharon, and one time guitar dealer Rick Harrison.) They drove over to our village for a pleasant lunch in our favourite village pub. We lingered a long time after we'd finished eating, discussing various illnesses and operations we'd all suffered to varying degrees. We're of 'a certain age' so such concerns inevitably come with it, unfortunately. But, in one way or another we're all survivors and fighters and, while we're able to make merry, make merry we will... After leaving the pub we retired to our house where, amidst coffee and more wine, I proudly showed some of my guitar collection to John who took an interest in each instrument I brought down into the lounge from their upstairs storage. John had experienced popular success in the past with the song 'St Elmo's Fire' though not without a long legal battle with his ex-manager to get his financial due. He now lives in a beautiful, big house, with a purpose built studio equipped with expensive, high-end equipment and I have to admit I felt rather ashamed showing him the tiny space I record in here at home and the flakey condition of my recording gear. But, it's what I have and I try to make the best of it. Hopefully, the end results aren't too shoddy. We all must work within our means. I gave John and Rick copies of my 'New Northern Dream', 'Songs For Ghosts' and 'Tripping The Light Fantastic' albums, hoping that they'd find something to their taste. I guess my style of music might seem a little odd or alien to them but hopefully there are one or two tracks that might connect. Otherwise, an uneventful day with no real work done, though tonight I have managed to lay down a bass part on a new song I'm working on. Will attempt some guitar right after writing this journal entry. I'll add a couple of images here, sort of related to yesterday's journal entry which mentioned an old Vox Transonic amplifier. These images are of me, way back in 1964 when I was in 'Group 66', (named after the song, 'Route 66.) They show me with my Vox AC 30 'Super Twin' amplifier, an amp which, if I still had it today, would be worth several thousand pounds. Well, that's the way the cookie crumbles...

A slightly frustrating day trying to get the company we bought our garden shed from to repair the roof felt which was stripped away in recent gales. Went around the houses with 'phone calls and emails with little success. Finally managed to talk to someone who said he could repair it for us. Sent him, via email, photographs of the damage but haven't heard a thing back yet. I wait in hope... Meanwhile, have managed to make a mark on a new song for my future album, tentaively titled 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky.' Only the basic foundations laid at the moment but more detail to be added over the next few days. Something to focus on. Another sleepless night, last night, filled with my usual dark thoughts and misgivings. Strange how during these early morning awakenings the reality of life's hard knocks comes to call. Is it all meaningless..? Managed a brief trip into town today and treat myself to a DVD box set of the newest 'Twin Peaks' series. I missed much of it when it was broadcast on tv last year but, what little I saw seemed powerfully strange and surreal. I'm looking forward to watching the whole thing, a little of it every evening. David Lynch has a way of tapping into my own dark corners and shining a little illumination on them. A remarkable film maker and an artist who I'd love to work with. Here, the ridiculously dumb Brexit debacle continues with a government that seems to have lost its grip and sanity. The whole thing is absolutely out of control and those who thought it would be otherwise are sadly deluded. Such a shame...But, as the old saying goes, 'never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.' I've almost given up on the 'English' to have the foresight and ability to make smart decisions anymore. Empirisist, nationalistic nonsense and way out of date. In York today, I was struck by the number of smaller and middle level businesses that have gone bust or disappeared from our high streets. The news is filled with such stories, mainly because of the fall in the pound, (due to the Brexit vote,) and inflation. Things will, of course, become much worse as 'Brexit', (despicable term,) kicks in. Those who opted for this dismal outcome will live to regret it big time, (or maybe they won't live long enough to see the negative result affecting their offspring.) Well, it's on their own heads, though, sadly, it will also be on ours too, and our grandchildren's. Dumb, dumb, dumb...As one of my old songs stated "It's a dumb, dumb, dooby dumb world..."

A cold day. Minus 2 Centigrade this morning. Emi picked up my insulin supply, needles and Statins from the pharmacy on her way back home from her Monday morning Pilates class, so I'm all set for a little while longer. Government having a cabinet re-shuffle, but nothing too dramatic so far. The foreign secretary, Boris Johnson, seems to have retained his job, despite his many buffoon-like gaffs, as has David Davies, the man in charge of our divorce from the European Union. So, the foolishness of 'Brexit' continues. I'm afraid that people who voted for it simply did not know the negative repercussions that would arise, more's the pity. They'll find out in time no doubt, (if they haven't already woken up to the consequences.) So many political intrigues around the world, particularly from America. That once great country is now cursed with the worst presidency in its history, (or at least, since Nixon.) What's going on over there beggars belief...An asinine, ignorant and impetuously dangerous fool in charge of the White House. The sooner this idiot's deposed the better we all will be. Spent most of today taking down the Christmas tree and the last of the interior lights and other decorations, a job that kept me house bound all day. Not like me to miss my few hours walking in town, but it needed doing and the cold weather helped to keep me at it. I'm supposed to be writing a description of my next album release, 'That Old Mysterioso' for my website's release page, but haven't got around to it yet. Will try to do it soon, if not tonight then sometime tomorrow. It's one of my better albums I think. (Hope that doesn't sound too boastful, like Trump decaring himself a genius on Twitter!) ;-) Had a brief conversation, (via Facebook,) with a man who used to manage a Wakefield group called 'The Fontanas', way back in the early 1960s. The lead guitarist was Johnny Welsby, who I briefly knew back then when I was in the early stages of learning to play the guitar. Johnny was a little bit older than I and used to tell me he was 'the fastest guitarist in Wakefield', which, I suppose was disputable and somewhat silly but, as an impressionable early teen I was duly impressed, (despite the fact that I'd never heard him play.) My dad, on the other hand, had the opinion that Johnny was just a 'big head.' Dad was always one for telling it how it was. Anyway, in the photograph that the person on Facebook posted of 'The Fontanas', Johnny Welsby seems to be using an extremely rare Vox Transonic amplifier. This amazed me as I have always understood that these amps were never produced in a marketable form but were purely 'one-offs' made for an early 'sixties band called 'Peter Jay And The Jaywalkers.' That Johnny had got his hands on one of these rare beasts back then is astonishing. So, to end this journal entry, I'm going to let readers see a photograph of The Fontanas with Johnny stood in front of his amp, (partly obscured in the photo',) and another photo' of Peter Jay And The Jaywalkers with the Vox Transonic amp in clearer view. Should be interesting to guitarists of a certainn age.

An uneventful day, apart with a frustrating email problem, due to some fault at BT's server I suspect. All working ok now though. Got an email from Pete Prown, the journalist who writes for the American 'Vintage Guitar' magazine, to say that he received by emailed answers to his interview questions. Quite a nice little interview I think and hopefully of interest to other musicians. Not sure when it will be published but will flag it up on my website once I have been informed. Emi has been busy preparing things for tomorrow's Japanese New Year lunch party she's throwing for her friends. The house will be filled with chuckling Japanese girls from midday on, so I'll either retreat here to my studio to do some more recording or have a wander around town. Weather predicted to deteriorate this weekend though. Noticed, on our drive back from town this evening, that a lot of the Christmas trees in house windows have disappeared . Tomorrow, (6th,) is supposed to be the day to finally take down your Christmas decorations but, due to Emi's party plans, plus our re-arranged vist to my mother on Sunday, it looks like Monday will be the first time we'll have time to dismantle everything. The tree takes a great deal of time to set up and to take down, so many delicate glass baubles and lights. Then there are the various lights and garlands throughout the house, plus three sets of different lights decorating the front and rear gardens. It took me three days to put it all up, but the taking down is always a chore. The house almost looks naked afterwards. I wonder if, at 70 years old this year, we should scale back a bit on the Christmas sparkles...but I had such lovely Christmases as a young boy that it's hard to let go of those memories and trimming up the house has always been a must for me in my adult life. Dropped off a repeat prescription request at the doctor's this afternoon. I'm almost out of insulin and needles for my daily injections, plus my Statin tablets are down to the last two or three. What with the Insulin, the Statins, the blood pressure medication, the various diabetic vitamins, Omega 3, tablets for macular degeneration, Prostate tablets, my regular eye injections plus ongoing treatment for my feet, I feel like I'm falling apart at the seams. It could be far worse, of course, but for someone who steered well clear of doctors and hospitals for so many years, it's a bit of a shock to the system. But I've adapted to it reasonably well according to Emiko, so hopefully, I can maintain things at this level. Reading a very good biography on Nikolas Tesla at the moment...a man well ahead of his time. But I awoke at 5:30 am this morning and couldn't get back to sleep, troubled by mortal thoughts, so switched on the bedside lamp and read a little of Ray Bradbury's 'Farewell Summer.' I first encountered Bradbury's work in the 1960s and immediately became a fan. He was a unique writer and his books still fill me with a poetic nostalgia and reverie. Will switch on the studio after dinner, (Emi has almost got it ready,) and see what the muse might have in store.

Spent the afternoon doing a bit of shopping in Leeds with Emiko. A rainy day after a very blustery night due to a storm with a name I've already forgotten. This naming of storms is a little strange and silly but I guess it puts some sort of personality on what is basically nature's indifferrence to human beings. Emi wanted to go to one of the Chinese supermarkets in Leeds where she can buy Japanese food. She's planning a traditional Japanese New Year lunch party for a few of her Japanese friends on Saturday. We visited Leeds indoor Market, which has some lovely old architecture, to buy some fish. Amazing that this nostalgic place was set for demolition several years ago but so many local people and traders got together and petitioned to save it. It's a real jewel in Leeds' crown and I only hope it continues to survive despite the surrounding area having succumbed to extremely high priced, flashy designer shopping centres. I wonder how some of these glitzy shops will survive when the repercussions of Brexit eventually kick all our buying power into touch. An item on tv news today about 'streaming.' As fans on my Dreamsville website know, streaming has been a topic of debate over the last two or three years. A great number of people now stream the music they consume rarher than buying it outright. A fairly cheap subscription to one of the many streaming sites allows people to listen to a wide variety of music via their computer, though they never actually 'own' the music, especially in the physical sense of owning a CD or vinyl album. It's like a version of a radio station where you pay a license fee to hear whatever music you want. Unfortunately, this system delivers extremely poor royalty returns for the people who actually create the music, and has been the scene of much controversy with artists complaining about the way it pays for their work. The news item today told how various music publishing companies are now entering into litigation with one of the major streaming sites, ('Spotify,') who they claim owes them several billion dollars in unpaid royalties. Am I surprised by this? No, of course not...it's been patently obvious from the beginning that streaming is just another example of unfair exploitation by the music business, (though that business has shifted its position from the 'analogue' realm to the virtual one.) The good thing about the internet in this regard is that you can by-pass the industry completely...no need for the old publicity machine, the record company execs and A+R men, just make the music in your home studio and get it direct to those who want to hear it. The less 'middle men' the better. The downside of this freedom though, is that anyone with the least amount of talent can also access these digital avenues to present their work publicly, which means there's a huge amount of less interesting, undeserving, dross to fight your way through to get to the good stuff. If you actually know what the good stuff is in the first place. Hey, ho... Back at the ranch, I've had a bit of fun making a flyer for a non-existent album. I had the idea for a cosmic sequel to 'The Alchemical Adventures Of Sailor Bill,' (or Sailor Bill in space, if you like.) Anyway, here's the flyer...maybe one day I'll make the album too.

Today involved another dreaded visit to the hospital for one of my regular eye injections. The process takes a while. The routine requires a blood-pressure test, (which was high, as usual,) a sight reading test for each eye, an electronic scan of both eyes, then a consultation with a doctor before the unpleasant ordeal of entering the injection room to lay on the couch and have a syringe stuck into my right eyeball. When I first began these injections, I was required to have one every four weeks. After several months, the period was extended to every eight weeks, and then, for the last two or three times, the interval was every ten weeks. Unfortunately, today's scan showed that there's been an increase in the diabetic related macular degeneration and an increase in the bleed at the back of the eye, so the doctor said I must go back to having the injection every eight weeks instead of ten. I wasn't pleased to hear that things had deteriorated and had hoped that the ten week intervals would continue but...I'll just have to accept it. After today's procedure was over, I had the usual blurry vision from the injection and, as the anasthetic wore off, a stinging soreness in the eye which has eased up a bit now but still feels very uncomfortable. This time though, I didn't get the numerous black blobs in my vision that usually occur when the drug is injected into my eyeball. These last roughly until the next day but no sign of them this time. I'm not allowed to drive for 24 hours afterwards so Emi comes with me to the hospital each time to take care of the transportation back home. Anyway, over and done with until the next one in eight weeks time. Not achieved much in terms of work today. The track I mixed yesterday is titled 'Luna Rose' and has been added to the list of possible tracks for 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky.' I may try to begin work on another new track for the album tonight though, depending on how I feel. Aside from that, there are still thirteen albums completed and queing up for release. Their titles are: 'Phantom Fuzzbox;' 'The Jewel;' 'Amplified Dreams And Wild Surprises;' 'Stupid-Serious;' 'Dynamos And Tremelos;' 'Electra;' 'Magnetic Travels;' 'Studio Cadet;' 'Powertron;' 'Aqua Moon;' 'Astral Overdrive:' 'That Old Mysterioso;' and 'The Unrealist.' I'm hoping to release 'That Old Mysterioso' next but it looks like its release date will slip back to February due to staffing problems at SOS. Meanwhile, here's another fun flyer for 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky.'

Well, here we go, falling, tumbling, sliding into another New Year. It's the first of January 2018 and has begun fairly quietly due to a slight hangover from New Year's Eve frivolities. Not that we went anywhere or had people here for a party or did anything wildly exciting. Emi and I spent it together on our own, quite content to do so, watching the usual Jools Holland 'Hootenanny' show on tv. It's become a kind of tradition but somehow seems to have lost a little of its excitement over the years, featuring fewer guest artists and no one who would really give you much more than a mildly pleasant, but fairly sedate evening's entertainment. Maybe it's because the bigger names or more avant-garde types don't get involved (or invited) as much as they should. Anyway, it was sort of ok and gave the two of us an excuse to stay up a little later than usual with a bottle of Champagne. Today was spent mainly at home, a slow day, slightly foggy of mind. Had a brief walk around Tesco's to stretch my legs and bought a DVD of a film I haven't seen titled 'LIFE.' Apparently it's an 'Alien meets Gravity' sort of movie. Which doesn't sound too promising, but, it's sci-fi so I'll give it a go. Going downstairs to watch it as soon as I've finished writing this journal entry. Oh, and I completed the mix of another track which will go towards a new album I'm spasmodically working on. The album may be titled 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky,' or maybe something else. It's all very embryonic at the moment. We'll see... So, before I close down for the night, here's a flyer I've mocked up for the album. Enjoy...and I wish you a VERY HAPPY, PEACEFUL 2018!

Approaching the end of another year. 2017 is retreating in the rear view mirror at a rapid pace. It's been a very strange year in many ways, the growing, negative repercussions of the Brexit referendum, the bizarre ascendancy of dangerous buffoon Trump into the White House. Russian digital meddling in the various political systems of other countries, and a general feeling that the lunatics (and the money-all-powerful,) have taken over the asylum. 21st Century? Feels more like the Middle Ages... I fear that things will deteriorate even further before we wake up and revolt against this popularist wave that has suddenly infected our social and political culture. I'm reminded of a postcard, once sent to me by my New York artist friend Frank Olinsky, which read: 'Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.' Well, some people may take exception to the term 'stupid people,' but there's no doubt that not everyone is tuned in to the deeper repercussions of their personal choices, political or otherwise. But what's the answer? As one time ex-PM Tony Blair said: "Education, education, and education." For all his apparent failings, I believe he was right on the button there to a certain degree... Life is not, sadly, a level playing field, and it seems that, (at this moment in time,) there's a worrying tendency towards bigotry, racism and jingoistic, nationalistic attitudes. Why, in this technologically, future-rich 21st Century world, we're still adhering to such out-moded, misplaced attitudes is, quite frankly, astonishing. I can't offer any real answer to these problems other than to keep saying what I believe in, and to pour those beliefs into the sound of my music. Whether it makes any real difference to my fans' hearts and minds is impossible to judge. One can only hope...

A sad and difficult day. This morning Emiko and I attended the funeral service of our friend Jane whose passing I noted in a previous journal entry. Her husband, (and our good friend,) Mark, read a moving tribute to her with tears in his eyes and moments of extreme grief and difficulty which touched the hearts of all the hundred or more mourners that packed our village church. I felt deeply for him. He was so brave and strong but clearly crushed by the weight of his loss. The weather this morning was cold with a blanket of snow, which made driving problematic. We slipped and slid down the lane to finally arrive at the church where cars lined the streets and also filled the church car park with people coming to say their fond, sad goodbyes. It’s a sign of how loved and respected Mark and Jane are that so many people braved the weather to pay their respects. I was both moved and numb with the tragedy of it all, so very, very sad... After the service we slipped away back home rather than drive through the snowy conditions across the city to the venue where the funeral reception was to be held. I needed to perform one of my daily diabetic blood-sugar tests and eat something that would control my levels. And, to be honest, the poignancy of Jane's funeral had become overwhelming. What words of solace could anyone offer in the face of such a cruel and unfair experience? Life and death, the great mystery, is a profoundly distressing matter for us all. The vicar, the church and the service, offered some comfort to those who hold to the Christian faith. I was grateful for the slight solace it may have given to Mark and his family. My own thoughts strayed to the nature of consciousness, the soul or spirit, and its place in the vast net of energy that connects us with everything else. I feel that Janey’s soul or spirit is still with those who loved her. There were one or two moments in the hymns sung in church this morning that were uplifting and went beyond mere doctrinal ideologies. Poetry profound, in its own way, particularly certain lines from ‘Lord Of The Dance’ and William Blake’s ‘Jerusalem’ whose English pastoral evocation of a holy paradise here on Earth rings bells, as do the lines ‘Bring me my bow of burning gold, bring me my arrows of desire’...Since first becoming aware of this old hymn at childhood, those lines have had a powerful resonance for me. Maybe it’s because I’m a Sagittarian archer. The rest of the day was spent at home, sheltering from the wiles of the weather. Experienced the usual difficulty trying to get my studio system to work but finally managed to spark it into life, albeit with a few problems to circumnavigate. Finished the mix of a new song titled ‘Certain Circles.’ I may have a second attempt at this over the weekend to see if it can be improved...or may just say, ‘sod it,’ and let it be. Every day counts for something and every day of life is precious. Make your mark with diligence and care, and leave love and joy behind you when you finally close the door on this world...

An intense week or so due to balancing Christmas preparations with more mundane duties, including a couple of medical appointments. I was required to attend an NHS Podiatrist's clinic to start a series of treatments for my feet, which are suffering problems, partly due to my diabetes condition. The second appointment was with a doctor to discuss my high blood pressure and I have now been prescribed tablets to try and reduce this. Once I've allowed 10 days for the tablets to take effect I have to do another week of self-diagnosed blood pressure checks, noting the twice daily levels on a form, and then return to the doctor to discuss the results. He will then decide if the dosage is adequate or if I need to take a higher one. Such are the travails of being on the cusp of 70 years old it seems. But how come I don't feel much more than 30 years old mentally? I'm buggered if I know... Emiko has been very busy fulfilling Christmas flower arrangement orders, plus orders for Christmas door wreaths and also teaching a wreath making class. Always a busy time of year for her, which throws all the more traditional preparations on my shoulders. The Christmas card list seems to grow each year but, somehow, I always leave it to the last minute and then scamble to remember everyone and get the cards written and into the post. Other overseas cards tend to be sent as email 'virtual' greetings these days though... Gift buying also takes time...I somehow agonise over the right sort of gift for the right sort of person. I'm sure I don't always get it right but at least the intention is sincere. But it's now the 'night before the night before Christmas' and I'm checking that everything is in place for our family get together to be a happy and memorable one. We're bringing my Mum over on Christmas Day, to enjoy the traditional Turkey dinner with us, (she will be 90 next year,) and my youngest daughter Elle and son Elliot are coming over on Boxing Day with their respective partners. I've only tonight fixed the Christmas cards we've been sent up on the beams in our living room...so nice to get those from old friends going back several years, particularly from my Art School chum Ian Haigh and his partner Anne, from Susan Quinn, (the wife of my late and much missed friend Alan,) from my eldest daughter Julia and grandson Luke, from my dear friends Kate St John and Roger Eno, from my old co-producer John Leckie, from my now retired manager Richard Chadwick and, oh, so many others who have played an important part in my life over the years. I treasure them all. Workwise, I haven't achieved an awful lot these last few weeks due to the demands of the season and the vagaries of my recording studio, (which still presents me with technical problems.) However, I have managed, (with some difficulty,) to complete a couple of new tracks. These are titled: 'HOUSE OF MYSTERY,' 'THIS AND THAT,' and 'THIS TOWN FEELS LIKE ANOTHER PLANET.' These will, hopefully, find their way onto a future album release, (though I haven't found a title/concept to accomodate them as yet.) I've had an idea for an album titled 'I AM HERE AND YOU CAN HEAR ME,' which could possibly work as a compilation of some of my favourite tracks from the last few years whilst trying to avoid the compilation that appears on the three volumes of Bandcamp digital download retrospectives. Then again, it might suit an album of completely new material. This time of year brings some warmly nostalgic, yet rather melancholic, thoughts. I've probably mentioned these before in this diary/journal but the foggy, swirling mists of time dissolve to reveal long-ago childhood wonders and innocence. The sweet and unashamed foundations of my desire to bring something of that time into the harsh climate we find ourselvers in today. My younger brother, Ian, (who passed away almost 12 years ago now,) and I shared some very poignant memories of Christmas together. Those Christmases, in the late 1950s, were uncorrupted by the kind of 'knowing' that childeren have today. We were naive and innocent, in a way which would be now thought of as embarrassingly 'uncool,' yet the memory of those times burns bright and warm and meaningful. I remember he and I sharing a bed on Christmas Eve and me reading to him from a book which contained the story of 'Peter And Pam's Christmas,' beautifully illustrated by an artist that, to this day, sadly, I have no idea of who he was. Ian and I would become so excited by the story and what it promised for Christmas morning and, even though I suspected that Santa Claus was really just mum and dad, I never revealed my suspicions to Ian who still held on to that magical idea of a white-bearded old man with a jolly laughing face coming down the chimney with the gift of toys. My father, (who worked as the manager of 'Broughton And Son's' shop in Hunslet, Leeds,) always made a great effort to create a magical Christmas Day morning for us. The shop sold, amongst other things (such as radios and televisions,) a selection of Dinky Toys, Meccano construction kits and Hornby 'Dublo-O' Train sets, which always found their way onto the lavish, (as I remember it,) display laid out on our living room floor on Christmas morning. Ian and I would wake early in much excitement and await our parent's permission to go and see what 'Santa' had brought us...and it always was wonderful. Not only Dinky Toys, Hornby trains and Meccano sets but Dan Dare ray guns, Roy Rogers cowboy outfits, magnetic Driving Test games, Magic Robot Quiz games, Eagle, Dandy, Beano, Beezer and Topper annuals, sweets and chocolates and a host of other goodies. These things would keep my brother and I occupied throughout the day whilst we had visits from relatives, my grandma, sometimes my aunt and uncle or neighbours. , And somehow, though I now know it's not really accurate, those childhood Christmases always seemed blessed by snow. There was certainly snow at times, though whether prior to, or after the Christmas festivities I'm not sure. But I can vividly recall building snowmen and, one time, an actual Igloo in the front garden of our house at 28, Conistone Crerscent on Eastmoor Estate, an Igloo which was built and shared in collaboration with our upstairs neighbour's daughter (and childhood friend,) Bronwyn Jackson, who was just a little bit older than myself. She was someone I had a very warm friendship with, back in those long ago 1950s childhood days. Now? All gone, nothing but flickering, fading memories. Distant, sweet moments lost in time, once fresh and minty but now little more than a faint taste of snow, evaporating, dissolving, vanishing into the empty sky. Just one more, perhaps meaningless, dot of existence in the infinite universe of human interactions. My mark is, nevertheless, here made, though it probably, inevitably, amounts to nothing. But I make it, in defiance of everything...

Spent the last few days in various states of agitation, the main problem being my home studio troubles. My good friend John Spence came over on Wednesday to try and sort out the various issues with my Mackie D8B mixing desk. This is the third of these Mackie desks I've owned and they have all eventually developed serious problems. After an entire afternoon of trying to remedy the problems with the system's mainframe, John said that it was probably a hard-drive failure. I suggested trying to attach one of the mainframes from a previous desk as a last resort, and, after a great deal of re-setting pass codes and the like, it was finally made to work...well, at least after a fashion... When I later tried to get to grips with a mix of a track I'd begun before the desk broke down, I encountered further, (and different,) problems which made no logical sense at all, nor did they respond to my own naive attempts to remedy them. These problems involved several faders on different channels which suddenly, and inexplicably, became locked down in their zero position, effectively rendering those tracks unusable. Other problems involved one particular piece of FX software not remembering its auxilary send allocations, despite putting them into position via the software codes, time and time again. That problem has now, thankfully, been resolved, but not without a great deal of hair tearing, (something which I'm getting very short of.) The other problem involves the attendant multi-track recorder which won't boot up when the system is switched on. It takes around a half-hour of switching off and on again and again before it responds and finally stays active. Cue more imaginary hair tearing... The amazing thing is that the basic design of the Mackie D8B desk is really good, a great interface that reacts like an old-school analogue desk, but with all the advantages of digital technology. Why Mackie didn't address the technical flaws that seem to arise from regular usage is a mystery. The company discontinued making this piece of equipment several years ago now, but its fundamental approach is extremely sound and very easy to use. It just needs a slightly better tech-survival overview, especially with regard to general wear and tear. (I must admit, however, to giving it a rather, er, thorough work out over the years!) Anyway, I struggle on and am loath to go down the standard, more acceptable route of using Pro-Tools and the like. Or of resorting to purchase yet another second-hand Mackie D8B desk at some expense. There's something about generic computer software solutions that seems to produce a stereotypical sound. I much prefer the quirkier and more personal approach of the Mackie digital/analogue hybrid. I've never cut and pasted my recordings, don't use much digital 'jiggery-pokery' at all...I play the parts in real time, hands, mind and heart, and if they're not good enough I simply wipe them and try again. It's the old analogue way of doing things, albeit on a digital platform, but it works for me and, I hope, helps make me sound like myself, rather than some identikit other. Meanwhile, back at the ranch...we're falling way behind with Christmas preparations. Not yet posted any Christmas cards, though I've written, (but not yet addressed,) a few. I have a fairly massive list of Christmas cards to post each year, mostly to people I haven't seen for quite a while but, nevertheless, feel connected to. Gift buying has also suffered due to other duties. This time of year always brings a number of stresses and strains...Emiko becomes very busy with flower arrangement orders, Christmas wreaths and so on, which tends to put the onus on me to get stuff in that will be needed for the festivities. I have to admit that I'm not great at dealing with all these things alongside my musical issues. I just end up looking at this and that and not knowing which way to turn whilst Emi calmly concentrates on her flower duties. One thing that really hit hard this last week was the very sad passing of a friend of ours, the wife of another good friend, whom we've known for around 19 years now. She succumbed to Pancreatic cancer after only a few weeks since her diagnosis. It's come as a great shock and a terrible reminder of the fragility of all our lives. I don't know how to console or offer words up to her husband...it's an impossible task. I suppose the only thing we can do is to stand by him and share in the grief and sadness. I don't pretend to have any answers to this random harvesting of good souls who don't deserve to be taken from us...it's cruel and unfair. But Janey was a sweet and good person whose passing has dimimished everyone who knew her. Here at Nelson Acres, (in actuality a very small plot amidst other small plots,) Christmas descends on the dark mood of now with the hope of a brighter future. Prayers, (whatever prayers may constitute,) are offered up to the God or Gods of antiquity with the heartfelt plea and hope that we may all be healed and find ourselves loved and valued, despite the horrors and conflicts that plague the human condition these days. I pray for the removal of cultural, racial, social and religious prejudice. I pray for the end of international conflict, (especially that posed by the current American and North Korean governments.) I pray for the relaxing of tensions that divide humanity. I pray for peace and harmony, especially an equivalent to musical harmony where diverse elements combine to create a beautiful whole. And, as an afterthought, here's a little view into our private front room this Christmas...

Frozen in more ways than one. Extremely cold here at the moment, especially in my studio which has no heating due to the one radiator being situated behind piles of equipment which can't be moved elsewhere. So it never gets turned on. I shan't stay up here longer than it takes me to write this diary/journal entry. Frozen out too by my continuing recording equipment problems. Unable to work but, as probably mentioned before, have managed to complete this year's Dreamsville Christmas video despite the difficulties. It's a sweet thing which I'll try to post on the Dreamsville gallery area's cinema nearer Christmas. Currently amassing images for another video which I'm planning to make for the song 'Drive This Comet Across The Sky'. I'll eventually post this in the Dreamsville cinema too as a prelude/taster of the album to come. (If I manage to get my recording equipment working again so that I can actually record the rest of the album.) Going over to mum's tomorrow to sort her supermarket shopping out and spend some time with her. At 89 years old she's physically frail but reasonably sharp. Actually sharper than me sometimes, to be honest. Strange dreams last night, (though I guess they're always pretty strange.) Awoke feeling distinctly uneasy this morning, despite only remembering fragments. My dreams often involve being in old cities at night, gas-lit cobbled streets, dark Victorian buildings and roads that wind mysteriously up steep hills away from industrial canals. A sense of another time and half-remembered mill towns, creaking in the dull yellow glow of dark alleyways and dim-lamp-burning windows. Sometimes strange women figure, part familiar, part total stranger. Often alluring, sometimes troubling: dark others, weird familiars, maybe succubus' of some kind. I guess my magical-occult past sometimes imprints these ideas on my unconscious mind...that old mysterioso... It's very cold now and I'm going downstairs to, untypically, do nothing but watch tv. Probably the news and the debacle that is the Trump presidency and the equally problematic Brexit issue. We live in dark times, I'm afraid... Here's a flyer for 'The Guitar Room', yet another imaginary album...and a cool picture of a young Merle Travis.

Down in the dumps. For the last few days, my recording studio has been out of action due to some fault or other with my mixing desk. Basically, it won't 'boot up' when I switch it on. I've tried switching off and switching on again, hundreds of times with exactly the same result: The software simply won't load and boot up the system. I just get a 'system error No 43' message on the desk's LED screen. Then it sits there, dead as a doornail... I had the desk repaired some time ago, (a very expensive repair actually, ) when it developed a similar problem. Now, it seems, it's back to square one. Extremely frustrating as I had a new track in progress titled 'House Of Mystery' which, obviously, I can't finish. I emailed my friend John Spence about the problem yesterday. He knows a little more about this stuff than myself. John then called the company who repaired the desk last time it broke down and the repair guy asked if it would be possible to email a photo' of the screen to him so he could see the error message. Not sure how much help that would be as I'd already stated what the error message was, but I took photographs anyway and emailed them to the repair shop in Surrey. I haven't heard anything back yet and the desk still refuses to boot up, despite trying to get it to work many times today. I just hope there's something that could be attempted to fix the problem, without the horrendous task of having to un-plumb the entire system from the studio and transport it down to Surrey for yet another expensive repair. Surrey is a very long way from here. Frustrating too, how these problems occur at the least convenient time. With Christmas rushing up with all its attendant pressures, duties and preparations, (family stuff to organise, gifts to buy, cards to send, a Dreamsville Video Christmas Card to create, etc, plus a brand new album in the wings, waiting to go for manufacture, the last thing I need is a major studio breakdown. Too much to deal with right now. Emi is attending a meeting at the Flower Guild tonight so I've had a solitary dinner and will now try to continue my attempt to decorate the house with various festive festoons, including the Christmas Tree. I set it up last night and arranged the lights and tinsel on it this afternoon. Now I have to begin to hang a multitude of baubles and objects on it to complete the look. After that, I'll turn my attention to the other main rooms in the house and put up lights and decorations there too. I've already hung the electric icicles on a pear tree in the back garden and they're now happily flashing, blinking and twinkling in the night breeze. (The lights, not the pears, which have long been harvested!) Apparently, the weather forecast is predicting very cold conditions on Friday, and for the weekend too. Time to light the log burning stove and watch an old, nostalgic Christmas movie perhaps...But, damn, the studio not working feels like my arms have been cut off.